January 1, 2006

The Resurgence of Real Guest Posers (We Hope!)

A number of years ago, I was at a local-level bodybuilding contest that featured a supposed "big name" guest poser. He’d competed numerous times as a professional that year, and he’d also been featured in quite a few of the bodybuilding magazines that were on the magazine racks. This pro bodybuilder was making something of a name for himself, and I suspect that a few people in the audience may have to come to the show just to see him.

When the competition started, the MC went through the customary greetings and then announced that we’d see the guest poser later that evening – the way it usually is at these shows – and that we were in for a treat because that special guest weighed "more than 300 pounds" that day! The MC said it to impress the audience, but almost immediately my eyes headed for the ceiling, my hand cupped my chin, and I thought to myself: 300 pounds – that can’t be good.

I was apprehensive because I’d seen this gentleman compete before, and if I had to guess I’d say he weighed about 240 pounds in competition condition, if that. So, here he was guest posing – at 300 pounds! Frankly, I knew that the extra weight wasn’t going to be muscle, and it probably wasn’t anything to be bragging about either. Still, throughout the evening the MC kept harping on the fact that we were going to see this 300-pound monster, and each time he said it, I shuddered as I thought about what the audience might be subjected to. As it turned out, I had every reason to fear the worst.

Saying this guest poser was out of shape would be like saying that Arnold Schwarzenegger did OK for himself. It’s a gross understatement that doesn’t even begin to tell the story of what we saw that night.

This professional, if you can call him that, came out wearing what looked like the same posing trunks that he wore when he was 60 pounds lighter – those trunks looked more like a thong. As for that 300 pounds that was being bragged about, he looked every pound of it – and that’s not a compliment. There wasn’t a cut on his body, let alone striations. His stomach was so big that it actually hung over his little trunks, and when he leaned over I thought that his belly was going to touch the floor. I’m sure that if he had visited a doctor that day, he would quite likely have been classified as obese.

What’s more, he proceeded to put on a performance that he might have called posing but wasn’t really bodybuilding posing at all, since he hardly hit any poses. In fact, I vividly recall that guest-posing routine being nothing more than a fat man dancing in a thong. The only positive thing I can say about that display is that it was memorable.

Surprisingly, he didn’t seem embarrassed, but I certainly was and so, too, were a number of others around me. I also felt sorry for anyone who paid just to see this side-show type of spectacle, particularly if they were thinking that they were going to see a real bodybuilding guest poser. He made the whole thing into one big joke.

Now flash forward a number of years to when I attended the 2005 Stratford Championships – an annual, local-level event held in the picturesque town of Stratford, Ontario. This show is probably the biggest local-level competition in Canada, with the night show almost always close to sold out. Most people come to see their family and friends compete, but often the promoters, Jamor Productions, bring in a good guest poser – a real guest poser – and it is likely people come to see that performance. This year it was Darrem Charles.

I’d seen Darrem compete before, and I knew well what he could do on a stage in terms of posing. In a nutshell, he’s great, and you don’t have to be a bodybuilding fan to appreciate his posing routines. But if you are a bodybuilding fan, you’ll like it even more, since Darrem’s one of the few pros who can choreograph an entertaining routine that includes dance, robotic moves and real bodybuilding posing.

At this show, the MC didn’t go on about how much Darrem weighed; instead, he built anticipation by telling the audience what a fine poser Darrem was, which is far more compelling, I believe, than trying to get the audience excited about how fat the guest poser is. And unlike the obese man in the thong who basically gyrated foolishly onstage, Darrem wowed the audience with an incredibly entertaining routine that was basically a "how to" lesson in terms of posing as a performance.

When you watch Darrem’s routine, you’ll see some of the dancing moves that other pros do – even the fat man in the thong – but they’re done much better by Darrem, and they’re done for effect and to enhance, not to cover up the fact that, perhaps, the person doing them doesn’t really know how to pose. Darrem knows how to pose; in fact, I think that today he sets the standard that the other pros should try to follow.

Although Darrem wasn’t in his very best shape in Stratford – I estimated him to be about 15 pounds over his competition weight, but certainly not 60 pounds – he at least had an excuse for not being contest-ready that day: he was just in the process of trimming down for the Toronto Pro Show, which was to be held in a little more than a month, and which he ultimately won. Still, Darrem looked good enough to guest pose that evening, and he certainly didn’t embarrass himself onstage with his appearance the way the other guy I described did. In fact, the opening "cover" photo this month shows exactly how Darrem looked that night in Stratford, because that’s when it was shot.

But Darrem wasn’t the only great guest poser this year. Jamor Productions also brought in Frank "Texas Tornado" Roberson for their London and Western Ontario Championships held in the fall. Honestly, I was a little skeptical when I saw Frank’s outfit when he was backstage – a cowboy hat, boots, and multicolor posing trunks kind of make you go hmmmm? – but I was sold on his value as a guest poser when he hit the stage.

Like Darrem, Frank is a real guest poser. Oh sure, he has plenty of theatrical elements incorporated in his routine – he not only dances, he uses costumes, props, smoke, and stage lighting too – but he knows how to pose very well. Again, those theatrical elements are used to enhance the posing, not overshadow it. What’s more, Frank was in pretty decent shape, as he should be – and I’m not talking just about shape in terms of his physique, but his cardiovascular shape too. In fact, after his first of two performances that night, he spoke at length at the microphone and basically challenged other pros to put on as good a performance for their audience, and then he challenged them to speak at the microphone as he was doing instead of gasping and practically falling over because they’re so out of breath after hitting just a few poses. With the energy Frank displayed, I’m pretty sure he could have posed all night.

So why is it that at one show a fat man gets on the stage in a thong and embarrasses himself and the sport, while at other shows the audience gets treated to real guest posers who actually show up in decent shape and perform properly? I suspect it’s because there are no real standards for guest posing and no lessons on how to really pose. And that’s exactly why it’s a crapshoot for promoters when they bring in guest posers for their shows – more often than not, there’s more disappointment with regards to the guest poser than excitement. Quite simply, most are a let-down.

On the other hand, memorable experiences usually get positive feedback, which is one of the reasons I’m writing this article and promoting the heck out of Darrem Charles and Frank Roberson. Quite simply, these are two of the best guest posers that I’ve seen come to our neck of the woods. As a matter of fact, I heard that Jamor Productions hired Frank to guest pose at their next contest in Windsor that was held two weeks later, and Frank thrilled the audience there with two routines that were completely different from the ones we had seen in London!

So, do Darrem and Frank represent some kind of resurgence in real guest posing? It’s hard to say, but I certainly hope so. If not, though, they at least set a standard that others should try to reach and the promoters should demand when they bring the posers in. These are professionals, after all, so they should deliver a professional performance.

As for the other guy – you know, the fat man in the thong – I deliberately left his name out of this article. Why? Two reasons. First, he’s not the only guy whom I’ve seen show up at an event the size of a hot-air balloon and do nothing but disappoint any fans he might have, or will have. Frankly, far too many have done the same thing, so I’m not going to single him out that way. Second, in the off-chance that he comes around to this site and reads this and realizes that all he accomplished that night was to disappoint the audience and tarnish his own name, then he might change his ways and put on a proper guest-posing performances in the future. After all, that’s what real guest posers are supposed to do.

...Doug Schneider, Publisher
das@seriousaboutmuscle.com

Doug Schneider is the publisher and chief photographer for SeriousAboutMuscle.com, BodyBuildingLive.com, and SeriousAboutFitness.com.